But I was overwhelmed with so much grief that I couldn’t really enjoy it. I couldn’t get myself together…and right now, I feel like I still can’t.
Unlike some of us, I had to work this weekend (community outreach) – Yeah, that’s right! I’m hating…LOL - But its all good…it was worth it.
But seriously, this weekend, apart of my job was to research the state of HIV/AIDS within my community and specifically among black women ages 25 to 50.
I was familiar with it first hand...The disease has touched me directly (I’ve lost 3 family members (ALL WOMEN) to AIDS related illnesses). So I thought I could handle this. I thought I was tough. But I was dead wrong.
When I did my research, what I found was frightening. I almost felt helpless when I learned where we (black people) stood in the midst of this deadly thing called AIDS.
I found out that African Americas make up almost 75% of all HIV/AIDS diagnosis in the area. And this is true for most areas throughout the entire United States.
On top of that, I found that because of the SILENCE and the stigma that people living with the virus face within our own community, people aren't disclosing their status. Nor do they want to get tested for fear of being stigmatized.
Because of this and many other factors, African American women (men and children) are dying from HIV/AIDS related illnesses faster than any other ethnic group.
I found out that almost 80% of the African American churches in my own community do not have HIV/AIDS ministries or departments, nor are they partnering with non-profit organizations and local government agencies to help our women, men and children who are dying from this disease.
This is crazy. If we know that black people account for almost half of the AIDS diagnosis in the United States!!! And you know most of us attend church faithfully every Sunday - anyone with a brain would gather that there are black people attending church every Sunday that are living with HIV/AIDS!!! DUH!!!
So why aren't we talking about this in the pulpit on Sundays?? Why?
Anyway, for my research I was given the opportunity to interview a Black woman who had been living with the disease for almost 12 years. And what she shared with me broke my entire heart into little pieces. She shared with me that when she learned of her positive HIV status, her church turned its back on her. They did not help her and encouraged her NOT to DISCLOSE her status to the congregation. She was even told by some to LIE and say that she had cancer instead of saying she had HIV/AIDS.
I firmly believed that if she was given a forum or opportunity to share her testimony, other lives could have been saved.
While listening to her story, I couldn't help but think about the women in my church that may be living "SILENTLY" with this disease. I couldn't help but think that they may be afraid to disclose for fear of being stigmatized. They can't even get support in the one place that is supposed to be safe and holy.
We need to see the face of this disease, we need to see with our own eyes that it could be your mother, aunt, your sister, brother, son EVEN your grandmother (yes, this woman was a grandmother) - we must take the stigma away from this disease.
Shouldn’t the church be a place of refuge for the broken and torn? Isn’t the church where we go to get healing, love and support? Why are they silent on this issue? Where are the churches?
We used the churches as a HAVEN during the Civil Rights Movement…It was the "meeting place," it was where we went to mobilize and strategize...
It’s the one place where the majority of us are one day out of the week. So why can’t this place…Our "church" be the place where the movement to eradicate this deadly disease starts? Why are we silent when our women and children are dying? Our babies are dying...Why are we silent on this issue?
All too often, we hear the scripture, Romans 6:23 quoted in churches that the “wages of sin is death…” but I learned this weekend from my research, that the wages of silence is death…
When will we start talking?
Because of our silence, we are dying.
Broken Hearted,
JCroft
4 comments:
WOW...what a very touching but heartwrenching post.
I think what you are doing is a step in the right direction. Although there are select individuals and outreach programs who dedicate themselves and knowledge to educating and bringing awareness to the masses, it STILL isn't enough.
Like you said, the Church is the one place where many Black people meet at least once a week. Why the Church isn't involved in bringing awareness to the ignorant and support to the ill is something far beyond disbelief. It is truly heartbreaking.
I know as a young, intelligent black woman, I myself could do more than what I do now, which is nothing.
We are quick to look down upon people who has this horrific disease but ignorance is bliss. We fail to realize that could be US!! We all have put ourselves in a situation where we could have possibly contracted HIV/AIDS but thus far, He has protected us.
Nothing is guaranteed and that includes your health. I can't speak from a personal standpoint, but what I can do is educate myself so that I can possibly educate others, even if it is just family and friends. If you are able to help at least one individual, you've done A LOT.
HIV/AIDS is still very much so still classified as a "gay" disease or a "nasty" persons disease or a "drug user" or a cheater...
noone in OUR community has come to grisps with the fact that women are sleeping with their HUSBANDS and contracting this disease...
its the stigma that keeps the church having its back on the community with regard to this disease...
my church is all about the community, and therefore my pastor does talk about it and he encourages us to participate in local activities...
so i am blessed with that regard and I can say that there are a lot of churches that ARE in fact speaking out about it...so be encouraged by that...
yes our people are dying, young and old (many people 50+ do NOT use condoms, they didn't use them before for various reasons like married the first and only person they were with and because they don't know how to date NOW, all the dangers)
we need to have an open dialogue in our community about this disease, I am tested every 6 months, regularly...because being tested once is not enough because the disease can actually lie dormant in your system for up to 10 years...(did my Master's thesis on this)
we needed to get tested together, as friends, as couples, whatever...support each other in the struggle...
this is our life we only get one, so we need to make sure that we live it right and to the best of our ability...
the fact that you CARE the fact that your heart is broken, says a lot about your character sis...stay motivated, take that hurt and redirect it to make a difference...this wonderful blog entry is definitely a first step...
stay up sis...
stay powerful....
stay encourage...
we WILL make a difference
I don't even know what to say J. This was very sad. I do know that by posting this, you are encouraging our brothers and sisters to break the silence that has plagued our people. If the churches won't do it, it has to come from somewhere... and your post is the beginning. Keep screaming out loud, just as I pledge to do the same.
This is definitely a heart felt blog. I encourage you as well to keep informing us as women. Lack of knowledge is what kills us as a community and a nation. Become encouraged that there are some churches that have not turned their backs and have ministries engaged in not letting those w/the disease feel like outcasts.
I am glad you are making us aware and even prompting women reading as well as myself to not take sexual promiscuity being young or old litely and that includes ORAL sex. Its a shame what God made for procreation has turned into an almost deadly choice in some cases. Keep informing the masses sis..With Love.....
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