The Wages of Silence is Death...Part 1

This weekend should have been a joyous time for me…and for the most part it was. I did the cookout thing and my family reunion was this weekend. My baby brother came to visit this weekend so we got to spend time with the family (pictures are coming).

But I was overwhelmed with so much grief that I couldn’t really enjoy it. I couldn’t get myself together…and right now, I feel like I still can’t.

Unlike some of us, I had to work this weekend (community outreach) – Yeah, that’s right! I’m hating…LOL - But its all good…it was worth it.

But seriously, this weekend, apart of my job was to research the state of HIV/AIDS within my community and specifically among black women ages 25 to 50.

I was familiar with it first hand...The disease has touched me directly (I’ve lost 3 family members (ALL WOMEN) to AIDS related illnesses). So I thought I could handle this. I thought I was tough. But I was dead wrong.

When I did my research, what I found was frightening. I almost felt helpless when I learned where we (black people) stood in the midst of this deadly thing called AIDS.

I found out that African Americas make up almost 75% of all HIV/AIDS diagnosis in the area. And this is true for most areas throughout the entire United States.

On top of that, I found that because of the SILENCE and the stigma that people living with the virus face within our own community, people aren't disclosing their status. Nor do they want to get tested for fear of being stigmatized.

Because of this and many other factors, African American women (men and children) are dying from HIV/AIDS related illnesses faster than any other ethnic group.

I found out that almost 80% of the African American churches in my own community do not have HIV/AIDS ministries or departments, nor are they partnering with non-profit organizations and local government agencies to help our women, men and children who are dying from this disease.

This is crazy. If we know that black people account for almost half of the AIDS diagnosis in the United States!!! And you know most of us attend church faithfully every Sunday - anyone with a brain would gather that there are black people attending church every Sunday that are living with HIV/AIDS!!! DUH!!!

So why aren't we talking about this in the pulpit on Sundays?? Why?

Anyway, for my research I was given the opportunity to interview a Black woman who had been living with the disease for almost 12 years. And what she shared with me broke my entire heart into little pieces. She shared with me that when she learned of her positive HIV status, her church turned its back on her. They did not help her and encouraged her NOT to DISCLOSE her status to the congregation. She was even told by some to LIE and say that she had cancer instead of saying she had HIV/AIDS.

I firmly believed that if she was given a forum or opportunity to share her testimony, other lives could have been saved.

While listening to her story, I couldn't help but think about the women in my church that may be living "SILENTLY" with this disease. I couldn't help but think that they may be afraid to disclose for fear of being stigmatized. They can't even get support in the one place that is supposed to be safe and holy.

We need to see the face of this disease, we need to see with our own eyes that it could be your mother, aunt, your sister, brother, son EVEN your grandmother (yes, this woman was a grandmother) - we must take the stigma away from this disease.

Shouldn’t the church be a place of refuge for the broken and torn? Isn’t the church where we go to get healing, love and support? Why are they silent on this issue? Where are the churches?

We used the churches as a HAVEN during the Civil Rights Movement…It was the "meeting place," it was where we went to mobilize and strategize...

It’s the one place where the majority of us are one day out of the week. So why can’t this place…Our "church" be the place where the movement to eradicate this deadly disease starts? Why are we silent when our women and children are dying? Our babies are dying...Why are we silent on this issue?

All too often, we hear the scripture, Romans 6:23 quoted in churches that the “wages of sin is death…” but I learned this weekend from my research, that the wages of silence is death…

When will we start talking?

When will we speak up?

Because of our silence, we are dying.

Broken Hearted,

JCroft

Remembering and Celebrating Malcolm X

From the looks of these last 2 posts...those of you who know me personally can tell that I spent the weekend with my Father. So I'm on that T.I.P this week (if you know what I mean)...LOL anyway - more seriously...

May 19, 2007 would have been Malcolm X's 82nd birthday. He was only 39-years-old when he was assassinated.

Today - We remember our brother Malcolm X.

The words of Malcolm X -

“We declare our right on this earth to be a human being, to be respected as a human being, to be given the rights of a human being in this society, on this earth, in this day, which we intend to bring into existence by any means necessary.”

“Sitting at the table doesn't make you a diner, unless you eat some of what's on that plate. Being here in America doesn't make you an American. Being born here in America doesn't make you an American.”

“The future belongs to those who prepare for it today.”

"When a person places the proper value on freedom, there is nothing under the sun that he will not do to acquire that freedom. Whenever you hear a man saying he wants freedom, but in the next breath he is going to tell you what he won't do to get it, or what he doesn't believe in doing in order to get it, he doesn't believe in freedom. A man who believes in freedom will do anything under the sun to acquire . . . or preserve his freedom."

"You can't separate peace from freedom because no one can be at peace unless he has his freedom."

"Stumbling is not falling."

"Nobody can give you freedom. Nobody can give you equality or justice or anything. If you're a man, you take it."

"The only way we'll get freedom for ourselves is to identify ourselves with every oppressed people in the world. We are blood brothers to the people of Brazil, Venezuela, Haiti, Cuba -- yes Cuba too."

"I believe that there will ultimately be a clash between the oppressed and those that do the oppressing. I believe that there will be a clash between those who want freedom, justice and equality for everyone and those who want to continue the systems of exploitation."

"I'm for truth, no matter who tells it. I'm for justice, no matter who it's for or against."

- Malcolm X
May 19, 1925 – February 21, 1965

Its So Much Bigger Than "Nappy Headed Hoes"

I was asked a few weeks ago by a good friend why I didn't blog or comment via the internet on the Imus controversy...and I didn't really know why. I couldn’t give him an answer…

My friend is originally from Africa, so his view on the plight of African Americans in THIS COUNTRY is slightly different than mines (and understandably so)...

Although he and I are connected as people of African descent and we share some of the same struggles as African people throughout the African diaspora...his views on the subject are different because we come from 2 different worlds & cultures...(I'll explain that in another post...)

Anyway, he said to me - "what's the big deal J? - Black people refer to themselves and their women as hoes, etc. on a regular. Just turn on the radio or listen to BET RAPS." What he said reminded me that some blacks, SOME rappers and those in the "hip-hop" culture use the words and terms regularly.
And HE was right - I couldn’t argue with him on that. But the RAP thing isn't the issue...I dug a little deeper....

I had to admit to him that night that I had people in my OWN extended family that referred to their children (yes - their children), family, friends and themselves on a Regular basis as:

B*tches
Mother F*ckers
Hoes
N*ggas/N*ggers
Whores

And sometimes the above names are used as a term of endearment by some of them…
Now - I have to let you know before I move forward, that the family members I'm referring to live in what we call the "hood." (I'm going somewhere with this...)

When I told my friend about them - I then realized that these family members all had a few characteristics or similarities in common:
Some if not all were:

Uneducated - high school dropouts
Convicted Felons
Unemployed
Dead beat fathers
Drug dealers
Living in poverty
Single parents with multiple children (3,4 and 5 kids)
On welfare and recieving public assistance
Drug & alcohol abusers
Had been formerly incarcerated
Living in public housing

Are we on to something here?? Hmmm...sounds like a nice research project.
Moving on...I believe that there is a bigger issue here than the phrase "Nappy-Headed Hoes" - and I’m getting to it…

Anyway, I had asked a friend/blogger to do a post about...but I didn't even entertain doing it myself...maybe, because I just couldn't get into it you know? I knew what IMUS said was wrong and it bothered me some...but for some reason - I just couldn't speak on it - like I normally do with other issues, etc.

But one morning on the way to work, I was flicking through the dial and on every "URBAN" radio station, 93.9, 92.3, etc. they were discussing the incident. I mean, it’s all over the news. People were calling and expressing their satisfaction on the firing of the host, etc. I mean Russ Parr was going crazy ya'll...

And on the radio, you could here clips of Al Sharpton with Jesse Jackson saying to the media in a press conference:

"It's not about taking Imus down," Sharpton said. "It's about lifting decency up."

I read in an article that Sheila Johnson, owner of the WNBA's Washington Mystics and, with her ex-husband Robert, co-founder of BET, said "Imus' comments were reprehensible in an interview with The Associated Press...and was worried that what he said could hurt women's sports."

Yes - an intelligent black woman, strong, politically connected...a millionaire and powerful business woman was worried how his comments would hurt 'women's sports.'

When I read Al Sharpton's and Sheila Johnson’s comment - I got angry. I MEAN seething mad.

I got heated because I thought of all the NEGATIVE charecteristics that the members within my extended family from the "hood" and many other blacks had in common and a comment from an old white man named 'IMUS' is what gets AL Sharpton, Russ Parr, Sheila & Bob Johnson and Jesse Jackson in an uproar??

And Sheila Johnson had the audacity to say that she was worried that his comments will hurt woman's SPORTS???? Oh MY GOD! What a tragedy!!

Every characteristic listed above (poverty, drug abuse, lack of education, etc.) is more than enough reason for Al Sharpton, Jesse Jackson and every other black leader with any sense, integrity and conviction to get ENRAGED and DEMAND that we (our community) do something to change this horrible reality.

Let's hold a press conference on what JESSE Jackson and AL Sharpton propose we as a community do to eradicate the above list. PERIOD.

As a BLACK WOMAN - Sheila Johnson should hold a press conference and tell the WORLD that she plans to FUND and sponsor a program or research project on HOW and WHY BLACK WOMEN ages 18 to 34 are getting infected with HIV like CRAZY! and dying from Full Blown AIDS at a faster rate than anyother ethnic group in the United States...
Why isn’t she "WORRIED" about this??? WHY???

Studies show that "Black communities, are more likely to be plagued by joblessness, poverty and drug use."

And we know because of the high ratio of women to men, a significant portion of whom (men) go in and out of the prison system where the rate of HIV infection is 10 times higher than in the general population contributes to the high number of infections among black women...

I mean the list goes on an on….

Let's have a press conference on these issues that are plaguing the black community:
Lack of self knowledge and education
Lack of job/trade skills among adults
Lack of effective parenting
Teen Pregnancy
Criminal Activity & black on black HOMICIDE
Brothers on the Down Low
Drug & Alcohol Abuse
Mental Illness
Disease (Diabetes, HIV, Cancer, Heart Disease)

These are the things that the GOOD and RIGHT Rev. Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson should be fighting against and "taking" down in our community instead of the old dinosaur IMUS!

IF they want to speak for the black community and be known as a leaders - they should be working around the damn clock to come up with solutions and recommendations to combat the above issues.

These leaders NO longer speak for me.

We need real people, real leaders, and clergy who will speak truth to power and look the deathly issues that are plaguing our men, women and children in the face and say NO MORE! No longer will we accept them and lay down and die quietly.

As a black woman - I will continue to work within my community and FAMILY to help combat these issues. I know I'm one person and I can only do so much within my own family. But I try - we all should try...I salute my fellow friends/bloggers (T.C. and Zuri) and others in the community who know its important to give back - in whatever way you can...

I know that I (we) cannot save the world...but I can help save those close to me. I believe that if we all take the time to look at what we (YOU) can do to help combat these issues...ONLY then - will change come.

We don't have black leaders like Ida B. Wells, Marcus Garvey, King, X, John Herik Clarke or Stokely at the forefront of our movement anymore to speak for us....the real soldiers of today can't even get 20 seconds of air time on local TV these days....

Jesse, Al and the likes of Cornell West get all the press...
But, if we wait on Jesse, Al, Sheila, and Obama to take up our cause...we'll be waiting a lifetime people...

It starts with YOU!
Straight from the heart,
J